Ear he comes… Derek Plank

Imagine Derek Plank’s surprise when, one morning, he looked in the mirror to find he had grown a gigantic ear. Covering his embarrassment with a large hat normally worn in only the fiercest winters, Mr Plank hot-footed it to his local GP.

“I explained to my doctor that the previous day I’d had a Covid jab. They told me I might experience mild ‘flu-like symptoms, no-one mentioned the possibility of growing a massive ear,” said Mr Plank.

“After she had stopped laughing my GP prescribed me some anti-inflammatories.”

However, the next morning he discovered that his other ear had grown to gigantic proportions too.

“At least it’s more symmetrical,” opined a bemused Mr Plank.

If you’ve had any humiliating or embarrassing side-effects as a result of a Covid jab, call our hotline. Please make sure you wildly exaggerate your symptoms otherwise it won’t be very interesting.

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