Tally-ho, Cucumber-Smythe

For Jocelyn Cucumber-Smythe, Master of the local hunt, things looked pretty bleak when fox hunting was banned.

“I thought we’d have to pack it all in,” he remembers sadly. “Then I had this tremendous idea of hunting humans instead. After all they’re just vermin, spreading disease, destroying the environment, eating Quorn. Now we can keep the numbers down and still have fun. It’s a win-win for everyone! Tally-ho!”

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